Sometimes, we need to tell ourselves a new story. After a significant life event, like a job change or a breakup, we have an opportunity to take stock of the stories we tell ourselves about the world and our place in it. Obviously, the end of my marriage and my new adventure as a single parent has meant doing some deep inventory about who I am and where I am in my life and where I want to go with these things.
One story I have told myself is probably familiar to a lot of folks: a story about how I’m not enough. Not good enough, not pretty enough, and maybe even not smart enough. I soak in a culture that profits from making me insecure about pretty much every aspect of human life, so this isn’t surprising. It is, however, something I can address. Therapy helps. Having a neutral outsider’s perspective on my life makes it easier to see the habits and patterns that keep me stuck. Major life shifts, like a separation/divorce, can crack patterns wide open and reveal all sorts of wonderfully painful truths about what I’ve tolerated and why I’ve made the choices I’ve made.
And then, the real fun begins! What to do with all that information? Information alone is not change. It’s just a doorway. Change requires being brave enough to cross that threshold and move into something new. As an artist, that’s part of my work. As a mother, that’s part of my work. As a human, that’s basically my whole job. So one of the things I’ve tried to do over the past year is set myself up for shift and change, with the idea being that this would happen whether I wanted it to or not so it was best not to fight.
One of the changes I’ve tried to make over the past year has been making better connections. I started by reaching out to my friends and chosen family when the excrement hit the air conditioning. Since then, I’ve worked toward building a bigger network, both socially and professionally. One of those connections led to an opportunity to teach a class in my neighborhood! I’ll be teaching an Introduction to Weaving workshop at Rhizome DC at the end of June. I’m excited to share what I love with local folks.
I have another exciting adventure story coming up, but I’m making sure my affairs are in order before I announce that. I am enjoying the experience of pushing myself beyond what’s comfortable and familiar, and I’m excited to see where these opportunities take me. Forward I go!